35. Poetry

35.2. Poemotions

35.2.6. Text of book

Part Ten (continued)

A Man's Desire for a Boy - How a Man Sees It

Start of page 238 in the book

Sea Urchin

Look here I said, when I saw this boy,
it isn't fair to do that to me:
Do what they said, what isn't fair?

You know all right, you've no right to ask,
no claim to get answers back from me,
I tried to reply, but they turned away.

Away they went and left the boy,
but they didn't leave him here for me:
he had other ideas you see.

Of course a boy, really a boy, would have other ideas than me:
really a boy, no one's toy
must have other ideas than me.

Oh it isn't his body I want to lay
end to end to the distant sea;
or even in bed, no sea bed - yet

of course I'd welcome him here with me;
of course my embrace would wrap him round,
and then no doubt he'd come to see

it isn't my spirit, pure, serene,
disdains the earthly, bodily touch:
but just the image of what must be

if all we can do is lay our flesh
end to end, end to end,
end to end to the farthest sea.

Start of page 239 in the book

Generation Gap

I give you thirty years
but which of us is the teacher -
which the taught?

Which of us is the seeker -
which the sought?

You are a tabula rasa
meekly awaiting the stylus:
but your meekness is only skin-deep.

My stylus cuts deeper than that;
too deep for your comfort.

Start of page 240 in the book

This Nearboy

This youth is nearby, by some stroke -
constantly nearboy:
mature Hal has to admit,
confused as he is - and always regretful

This nearby adolescent arouses desire in Hal.

In a man such as he has been chosen to be
such stirrings are usual -
yet consistently unwelcome
even though joyful all the same.

Whoever he is this nearboy adolescent arouses sweeping desire in Hal.

Hal's mature mind
dismisses this physical
and, like the law, informs him loftily
that the boy is vulnerable.

Yet this nearby flushing blushing adolescent arouses desire in Hal.

What does some part of Hal care
if the stupid boy is vulnerable?
that part wills powerfully
to have its expressive way.

Whoever he is this nearby adolescent arouses desire in men like Hal.

On the whole Hal is with it
for it is he;
yet just look at that nearby weeping kid!
- scarcely more than a child.

It is this youth who arouses physical desire in Hal.

Start of page 241 in the book

Hal knows he should let him have his life;
allow him to continue undisturbed by lustful pederasts
along the hard path
to his hoped-for maturity.

Yet this sweet nearby adolescent constantly arouses desire in Hal.

How Hal longs to fondle him!
For this adolescent youth is the long-past Hal
as he has been ever since -
how adorable his luscious defencelessness!

This nearboy adolescent insistently arouses desire in this unusual man.