Francis Bennion - Poetry - Poemotions - A Man's Desire for a Boy

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35. Poetry

35.2. Poemotions

35.2.6. Text of book

Start of page 209 in the book

Part Ten

A Man's Desire for a Boy

Prologue Ten 210

Seeking a boy

Little Bobby Greenaway 213
A Date With a Boy From the Agency 214

The nature of the desire

Arnold, Riffi and Dan 216
Body's Work and Body's Waste 218
Men In Their Thousands 220
Bum Fluff 222
A Song of Pu- Pu- Puberty 223
A Male Mystery 225
No, I Won't Do That 227
A Busy Prison Visitor 229
Eton Gloating Song 232

How the boy sees it

Dear, Kind Uncle 233
Reproach from the Young One 235
Rough Trade 236

How the man sees it

Sea Urchin 238
Generation Gap 239
This Nearboy 240
The Wrong Thing 242
Why not Stay Fifteen For Ever? 243
Loving Capacity 244
Those Important Things 246
Silent Worship 247
Receiver and Response 248
Obstacle 249
Self Taut 250

Society's response

Plea in Mitigation 251
Poor Boys 254
How Father Peter Succumbed to the Mystery of Evil 255

Start of page 210 in the book

Prologue Ten

This large group of poems treads on tender ground. Most people do not take to the idea that a man might desire a boy sexually. For many sound reasons it does not seem right. The law agrees.

I speak of the sort of man-boy affection known as pederasty, where the abused boy has attained puberty. Paedophilia, where the abused boy (or girl) has not yet attained this condition is a wholly different matter. Why? Because pubescent boys are ready for sex. The train has arrived at the station. The engine stands there with its hot boiler impatiently hissing.

You might tell righteous people that this sort of man-boy affection was commonplace in ancient Greece. They would still call it abuse. They would look at you and say: what have I and my dear delectable rosy-bottomed young son got to do with the abominable sexual practices of the ancient Greeks?

You might try telling them about the way Afghan tribesmen go on even today. Disliking women, they prefer boys as sexual consorts. The Times of 12 January 2002 reported that with the fall of the puritanical Taleban the old sexual practices were resumed: 'Visible again are men with their ashna, beloved boys they have groomed for sex'.

Still our public would call it abuse. It has been decreed by the media-led people of our day that any sexual dealing with a pubescent, even by age-mates, is abusive. I can't argue with that, and wouldn't even try. The poet, true to his vocation, takes no sides but merely reports. Since a great many men lust for boys this must, in the name of truth, be reported. Especially when the poet receives innumerable messages to that effect.

Because this topic is widely neglected in what our media publish that does not mean it is unimportant. As a professional poet who merely reports what is transmitted to him I can testify that I have indeed received an awful lot of messages in this area. (Or one might say a lot of awful messages.) The truth seems to be that this location imports a whole lot of heartache. Some poor men take all this very seriously indeed, and not because they want to be 'like that'. They regret it, and feel it is wished on them

Start of page 211 in the book

by some malign force. Against their will, that is. Very much against their will.

All that is why this group of poems is elaborately organised into five sub-groups: seeking a boy, the nature of the desire, how the boy sees it, how the man sees it, and society's response. The aim is not to be comprehensive, but merely to help comprehension - if such a thing as this can be made comprehensible.

Seeking a boy Prances, long-legged prances, spring Bobby Greenaway far past the shops, far on from my Spring. So I try a date with a boy from the Agency.

The nature of the desire The school teacher Arnold and two boys dance a pavane of longing. Underneath your earthly clothes your youthful body glows: mine, past glowing, is better not showing. Grown men in their thousands lust after pubescent boys. Human sexuality has two levels: participating and not. I sing a song of pu- pu- puberty. There was once in London a teacher who would suddenly squat beside him in a lad's desk, just to give the boy a lovely surprise. The child in him, the future man in him, pierces me: really I don't know why. The busy prison visitor visits a fallen Etonian who has sung, once too often, the Eton Gloating Song.

How the boy sees it The boy may see me as a dear, kind uncle to whom he needs to give nothing back. He is likely to reproach me for my thick waist. The rough trade sing-

We will give you our time if you pay us,
give you our bodies too.
None of our soul will we give though -
it's not for the likes of you.

How the man sees it Look here I said when I saw this boy, it isn't fair to do that to me. I give you thirty years but which of us is the teacher, which the taught? This youth is nearby, by some stroke - constantly nearboy. The line is drawn: I did not draw it, but feel it, dry as my skin is. Do some French think quatorze a suitable age for a boy, or quinze? You in your teens, you with your bright eyes, I in my forties, what could come of that? I think of those important things, to which my life must defer. Youth observed must be served; worship then, but silently. His miraculous eyes on that one evening received a million signals. It is an obstacle to my peace of mind that there should be youths.

Start of page 212 in the book

I lie with you, you lie with me; lying together, we lie separately.

Society's response That animal in the dock obscenely violated my darling child: tear him limb from limb, it's the least this ridiculous court can do. So let it be: cause there to be prepared four stallions, furnished with an equivalent number of strong ropes. Someone should tell the poor boy what is what - instead of leaving him to suffer uselessly (but of course they don't/won't). When it came to his defence, Father Peter felt destroyed by having been accused of succumbing to the mystery of evil. If evil is after all these years still a mystery, he muttered, what has the Church been doing?

Start of page 213 in the book

Seeking a Boy

Little Bobby Greenaway

I see this sunshiny young boy
in the street from the back
dressed in loose green with floppy sleeves

When he jumps to catch the trees
the pale green clings
round his small shape

He turns the half-adult head
swinging yellow hair
feeling my glances

Prances, long-legged prances
spring him far past the shops
far on from my Spring

Start of page 214 in the book

A Date with a Boy from the Agency

On reading the letter

I am about to fall in love
with a postboy.

We haven't yet met
but the Agency say